How to Deal with Unfair People Using Biblical Wisdom
Let’s explore how to respond to life’s unfairness with biblical wisdom, Christ-like patience, and unshakable faith. By the end of this podcast, you’ll not only know how to face unfair people but why doing so can be your greatest act of faith.
The Universality of Unfairness
Let’s be real: unfairness is baked into the human experience. From the moment we can say “That’s not fair!” we’re already engaging with life’s hard reality. The Bible reflects this too. Ecclesiastes 7:15 sums it up perfectly:
“In this meaningless life of mine, I have seen both of these: the righteous perishing in their righteousness, and the wicked living long in their wickedness.”
The truth? Life isn’t fair. It never has been. And it won’t be—at least, not in the way we expect. This can feel like a hard pill to swallow, especially when we believe in a just and sovereign God.
God’s Perspective on Unfairness
Here’s the twist: unfairness isn’t a flaw in God’s design—it’s part of the process. Unfairness, at its core, exposes our hearts. It reveals what we cling to for validation, where we place our trust, and whether our faith is in God or our circumstances.
This brings us to our first pivotal question: How do you respond when life isn’t fair?
Part 2: Jesus and the Model of Patience
The Ultimate Example
No one experienced unfairness more profoundly than Jesus Christ. Let’s break this down: He was sinless, yet treated as a criminal. He healed the sick and raised the dead, yet was mocked and rejected. And the ultimate injustice? He was crucified for sins He didn’t commit.
When we look at Isaiah 53:7, it paints a vivid picture of Jesus’ response:
“He was oppressed and afflicted, yet he did not open his mouth; he was led like a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before its shearers is silent, so he did not open his mouth.”
Jesus didn’t retaliate, defend Himself, or demand justice. Instead, He entrusted Himself to God’s perfect plan.
The Power of Restraint
Here’s the profound truth: Jesus’ restraint wasn’t weakness. It was power under control. His patience was rooted in the knowledge that God is the ultimate judge.
Let’s pause here and reflect. How often do we react to unfairness by taking matters into our own hands? Whether it’s a snarky comment, passive-aggressiveness, or outright retaliation, we often let our pride dictate our response. But Jesus shows us a better way—a way that requires trust, humility, and a long-term perspective.
Part 3: Practical Steps to Respond Like Christ
Step 1: Acknowledge the Pain
Let’s not sugarcoat this: unfairness hurts. Pretending it doesn’t affect you isn’t Christ-like; it’s denial. David, the man after God’s own heart, frequently cried out about the injustices he faced. Psalm 13:1 captures his raw honesty:
“How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?”
When you’re dealing with unfairness, start by bringing your pain to God. Prayer isn’t just about seeking solutions—it’s about processing your emotions in His presence.
Step 2: Release Control
Here’s the game-changer: You don’t have to fix every unfair situation. Let that sink in. Romans 12:19 says:
“Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord.”
This doesn’t mean you become a doormat. It means you stop carrying the burden of justice. Say a prayer of release for what’s out of your control. Let God be the judge—it’s His role, not yours.
Quick win for today: Stop what you’re doing, take a deep breath, and say this prayer:
"Lord, I release this situation to You. I trust You to bring justice in Your time and Your way."
Step 3: Choose Love Over Bitterness
This is where the rubber meets the road. In Matthew 5:44, Jesus flips the script on how we treat unfair people:
“But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”
Loving someone who wronged you isn’t about letting them off the hook; it’s about freeing yourself from the chains of bitterness. Think of it this way: Bitterness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to suffer. Forgiveness, on the other hand, is an act of self-liberation.
Step 4: Keep the Big Picture in Mind
The unfairness you’re facing now is temporary. Let’s revisit 1 Peter 2:23:
“When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly.”
Jesus endured injustice because He saw the bigger picture—eternity. When you trust God’s plan, you’re free to live above the fray, knowing that ultimate justice is coming.
Part 4: A Personal Story of Transformation
When I was younger, I worked for a boss who seemed to have it out for me. No matter how hard I worked, he criticized me in front of others, took credit for my ideas, and even sabotaged my projects. I remember sitting in my car after work, feeling crushed and helpless.
But one day, something changed. I came across Proverbs 3:5-6:
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”
That verse became my lifeline. Instead of reacting to my boss’s unfairness, I started praying for him. I released my need for justice to God and focused on doing my job with integrity. Over time, not only did my attitude change, but so did my boss’s. By the time I left that job, he was one of my biggest advocates.
Part 5: Conclusion and Call to Action
Here’s the bottom line: Unfairness is inevitable, but your response to it can be transformational. When you acknowledge your pain, release control, choose love, and keep eternity in focus, you’re living out a Christ-like patience that changes hearts—starting with your own.
So, here’s your challenge for this week: Think about one unfair situation you’re facing. Pray the prayer of release, and take one step toward responding with Christ-like love.
If this message spoke to you, visit FaithLabz.com for more resources on navigating life’s challenges with biblical wisdom.
And remember, unfairness may be part of life, but it doesn’t have to define you. By responding like Jesus, you’re not just surviving unfairness—you’re overcoming it.
Let’s live this out together. Until next time, stay strong, stay patient, and stay rooted in Christ.